Post-Speech Reflection

Elevator Pitch Self Evaluation: The recorded Speech

The Pre-Speech:

My pre-speech was very brief, but sufficient. I was loud and clear- got the message across. Here it is because it is not in the video:

In an elevator with Bernardo - a local Business owner focusing in Party Rental to Mexican community - at a party venue and I am trying to convince him to recommend my photography services to his clients. I also add that we are from the same place in Mexico and are already acquaintances

Start

·         Setting a more realistic Rhetorical Situation from the beginning

o   I opened by greeting Bernardo, my Audience, casually, but I could have created a more IMMERSIVE setting by pointing out his reason for being there and why I am there too. That would help me transition into talking about myself and my photography more realistically

·         Building greater confidence and speaking more loudly and clearly

o   I started off with some stuttering and spoke with a shakiness in my voice. I was nervous, but gained confidence throughout as I got more comfortable. In the future, I want to start strong and build up from there.

·         Standing up straighter and looking towards the audience

o   I made Bernardo stand in the corner of class. This led to me looking mostly away from everyone and I would prefer to look towards everyone instead. Next time I will look out to the class because I find it much more convincing.

·         Getting to the hook much sooner

o   I was beating around the bush for a short while to try and hit the ideal time point, which I did successfully, but would like to include more substance like statistics and numbers so that I can get to the hook without stalling out my introduction and credentials. I spent too much time on me.

·         Speaking to the audience’s needs from the beginning

o   Again, spending a lot of time on what I can do is important, but if I gave my credentials in terms of my audience’s interests - like getting more clients or making more money - it would have gotten more attention and consideration.

·         Engage the audience in deeper thinking

o   I did not ask any questions at all. Asking questions is a great strategy for getting the audience actively thinking, involved, and committed to whatever you are idea you are selling them. In the future I will think of some deep questions and try to paint a situation for the audience to think about that puts my services in the best light possible. Bernardo has a big family, it would have been great to pitch a photo-shoot with them to prove my skills as a photographer

·         Mentioning actual products and their Purchasability

o   I mentioned that I had lighting, made prints and set up photo-booths, but it would have been very beneficial to drop some numbers down to validate my services. For example, I could have said something about most Santa Barbara Mexican families only getting portraits every other year. Also I could have mentioned the prices I sell prints at and what I charge for bigger products like metal or wooden prints or creating photo books.

Stop

·         Keeping my arms up at my hips and repeating the same gestures within a short time frame

o   I felt like I used gestures very well at times, but my arms kept moving to an awkward right angle with my elbow at my hips and close to my body. From two years of music performance classes I know better and should stop repeating gestures so frequently and only use them when I want to emphasize the most important things. I should also avoid using the same few gestures and switch hands occasionally while looking normal and relaxed or engaged naturally.

·         Repeating words and stuttering

o   Again, I was nervous. I seemed to lose my train of thought and repeat the first word of my sentences occasionally. This happened like 4 times around the beginning and got better as I progressed.

·         Using filler words and allowing my voice to shake

o   I do not use the word uh more than 3 times in my speech, but I did use other phrases like “you know or anyway.” As before, stop the jitters and gain control of voice so I can speak as clearly as possible.

·         Repeating statements and getting out of order

o   I repeated the segment on my specific services (lighting, photo-book + booth etc.) and even did the same numbering gesture with my hands. I believe I did this because I lost my train of thought and was unsure of what direction to take the interaction to. Essentially buying time.

·         Allowing body positioning and expressions to seem dispirited

o   At certain points I seemed to lose my enthusiasm, let my arms fall suddenly to my sides, and allow my facial expressions to become totally neutral. This is not a salesmanly thing to do and would probably communicate that I am not confident in what I am offering.

·         Pacing back and forth

o   I did not do this too much, but I did notice stepping forwards and stepping back a few more times than I needed to which combined with my arms kept close and slightly hunched back suggest a defensive body language that suggests my discomfort or nervousness

·         Making generalizations about the community in question without explaining further

o   I said people don’t usually have photo-booths at parties, but should have explained why more thoroughly or at least addressed more clearly what community I was referring to; it seemed like I was making broad generalizations.

Continue

·         Using hand gestures

o   I want to stop using too many, but they are good in moderation.

·         Speaking at a good pace and linking Ideas

o   I though my speaking pace was excellent

·         Addressing my value to the market

o   This is something that I did communicate sufficiently. I said what people wanted, covered how I could give it to them and how Bernardo could help

·         Using strong eye contact and body language

o   Though I was looking at the corner of class and was somewhat defensive, I looked at that corner unflinchingly and stood my ground.

·         Connecting with the audience

o   I enjoy speaking for people and giving speeches, but I am still not totally comfortable doing it in a classroom or formal setting. Connecting with audiences is what I do best giving speeches for fun in random places like restaurants, parties, or in public.

·         Listing my services and comparing them to the opposition

o   Another of my strong points. I covered this extensively addressing the market and what it lacked as well as how I could provide it.

·         Getting real with my audience by conveying sincere interest

o   Back to audience connection, I think it is very important and want to stress continuing this